Shadowheart
by Merveilleux24
Summary: Can Heather be freed from her dark past? And what will happen when the Cullens move into town? Circa 1950s. ON HIATUS.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Edward's _divine_, I wish he was mine! (Swoons)

* * *

I was walking to the church again. I wasn't entirely sure why I kept coming to this one, or if coming would grant me any mercy.

_But I was going to try_. If there was any way to lessen my sins of the last three-hundred ninety-eight years, I would do it.

Hell, I might as well add those of my human life, too, although I didn't remember any of them. If they were anything like those of my

vampire life, I should have added them centuries ago. I often imagined myself as a solitude monk in some distant European country,

repenting in isolation. That would never happen though, because as a rule monks are not bloodthirsty, or, for that matter, doomed to

hell. I was both.

This church seemed to accept sinners. It was old and stately without being showy or pretentious; and most of all, you could feel the

life in it, the kindness. Even without sitting on the roof during its blissful Sunday service, one could tell that _this _church wasn't just a

building; it was a home, for a family of friends and believers.

I smiled as I finished climbing my way to the top and sat down, one leg on each side of the roof. The church was silent today-as it

wasn't a Sunday-but the view was great; each tree below me was dressed in its finest fall splendor, as if to demonstrate the beauty

and might of its Creator. I closed my eyes and almost felt at peace.

I often wondered what would happen if someone saw _me_-a slender brunette seemingly in her late twenties in small black dress and

heels-up _here_... the shock and confusion... but that was purely hypothetical; humans were much too slow to notice anything, as I

could always smell when they were coming and escape.

Something wasn't right... I froze. Today someone had finally noticed me. I could smell another vampire behind me on the ground, only

a few hundred yards away. I was irritated. Whoever he was, I didn't want to deal with him now, or ever. I turned around and

jumped off the roof. Then I warily stood to meet him; a tall, young man with reddish-brown hair and, _of course_, pale skin.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Edward's divine, I wish he was mine! (Swoons)

* * *

Something wasn't right... I froze. Today someone had finally noticed me. I could smell another vampire behind me on the ground, only 

a few hundred yards away. I was irritated. Whoever he was, I didn't want to deal with him now, or ever.

I turned around and jumped off the roof.

Then I warily stood to meet him; a tall, young man with reddish-brown hair and, of course, pale skin.

* * *

"I'm not here to make any trouble," he stated. "I just want you to know that you're wrong; you're not damned." 

"Oh?" I asked, not caring what he had to say.

"Yes. You're not."

_Leave me alone._

"Or _what_?" he asked, curious. Obviously he could read my mind. I'd heard about vampires with powers, but had never actually met

one before. I didn't care though. This didn't change anything.

"I'll kill myself."

Well, no. I wouldn't kill myself. What a stupid thought! Why rush divine retribution? I don't know... maybe...

Hell might actually be a refuge compared to this.

I'm not going to risk it, though. And it would be much too hard to do, anyway. I was wearing a silver necklace now,

which ended just inches above where I had once staked my own heart.

He winced slightly as he heard my last thought.

"What's your name?" I asked, more out of courtesy than curiosity. I liked his spunk.

"Edward Cullen." He answered immediately.

"Have you lived here long?"

"No, we just moved into town a few weeks ago."

"'_We_'?" I thought, apprehensive.

"Yes. There's me, Charlise, Esme, Rosalie, Emmet, Jasper and Alice."

"Mmm... What do you drink?"

"Only animal blood, like you." I nodded.

"Your family?"

"The same."

"Your name?" Edward asked.

I almost didn't bother to respond.

"Heather." There was a long silence.

"Well, I won't crowd you-" I began.

"You're not." Edward smiled at my lame excuse to escape.

"Actually, you should think about coming to meet my family."

"I... will think about it."

With that thought I nodded him farewell and he left through the trees. I resumed my post on the church. He was a nice kid and had

good intentions, but he probably hadn't been a vampire for even a hundred years yet. He had no idea...

After a few hours, I decided to walk back to the forest where I was staying, and maybe go hunting. I checked on my "home" and set

out east, striding quickly and almost silently through the trees, searching for blood. I stopped almost as soon as I had started.

A small doe was only a few yards away, frozen in fear. I could feel the adrenaline pumping through her veins. I jumped out and

grabbed her, holding the deer in my arms, gently stroking her. It would be far too easy to kill the young deer...

I let her go and hiked a few more miles before overpowering a bear.

I walked back west slowly, in no hurry. There was so much life and beauty around me. I watched the sun began to set on yet another

day. I stared at the sky for a long time while walking back... then I clenched my eyes shut for the rest of the slow journey, no longer

wanting to be reminded of death yet again.

As the light faded, I remembered my pain. As a night chill crept in, I was suddenly bombarded by my memories. I opened my eyes,

since it was pointless to try and forget what had happened, what I had done, and quickened my pace. I was now running almost as

fast as I could.

The trees now began to look like huge hands reaching up for mercy... or vengeance. My eyes flickered past a frozen lake, and I

slowed down as I neared home-a tall willow. I imagined that my entire existence since I was "reborn" was just like someone trying to

walk over a huge frozen lake—with the scorching heat of summer above and the flickering fires of hell always growing beneath—

where each step one took cracked the ice just a little more... I shuddered and settled down next to my tree for the night.

Then I surrendered. I couldn't hold off the darkness of my past anymore. I remembered John. John—my first and only love.

I had tried to protect him, to hide my feelings for him, and to resist his every advance. In the end I had failed at everything.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Edward's divine, I wish he was mine! (Swoons)

A/N: I don't think I'll _ever_ get tired of this disclaimer!

* * *

EPOV 

As soon as I made it back to our house, I was bombarded once again by a cacophony of thoughts. Everyone was home, and

everyone had a different question to ask.

* * *

"Edward! Where were you?" shouted Esme. _Alice said not to worry, that you were safe, but... where __**were**__ you?!? And who is _

_this vampire you met? Alice wouldn't say anything..._

But her worries were soon dimmed by Alice's more trivial ones: _Edward, was that dress __**really**__ what she was __**wearing**__? I mean, _

_that has been out of style for __**decades**__! Do you think Heather will go shopping with me? _Alice closed her eyes to See.

_Ooh, yes!! And she'll look so lovely in that skirt!_

_"Alice!"_ I admonished, "You're _not_ going to force her to go shopping!"

"Yes, I _am_!" she pouted. "_You_ Saw it, too! ...Besides, it's not just for me; she really _needs_ it!"

"_Alice_!" I was about to tell her off, but unfortunately Rosalie interrupted.

_So, what does she look like? Is she pretty? How old is she? ...I guess I won't be able to borrow anything from her, if what Alice says is true... _

Emmett wondered if she was interested in sports, while Esme was about to ask if I _liked_ her. It was all so overwhelming... and then it

suddenly wasn't.

Everyone had calmed down _instantly._ I sent Jasper a huge wave of relief and gratitude. He smiled and nodded in response. _Anytime._

I began my story. "Well, as I was walking past the church, I spotted Heather, so I stopped and asked her some questions, like how

long had she been living here, and if she would come meet us."

"What'd she say?" asked Emmett.

"Not much..." _That wasn't true, exactly, I thought to myself; I'd heard a LOT of things-they were just so jumbled _

_that I couldn't make any sense of them- all I could tell was that: _

_she had been totally alone for a long time,_

_I reminded her of someone she had known,_

_she felt terribly guilty for something; perhaps she had a bloody past? _

_and that she was afraid of connecting with me, or any of us._

I forcibly shook myself out of my thoughts. "Well... she _didn't _really _say_ anything, but she's been in the area for a while,

she's used to living alone, her full name is Catherine Heather Morgan... and... she believes she's damned to Hell."


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Edward's divine, I wish he was mine! (Swoons)

* * *

A/N: Looking back on this, I've realized that the telling of Heather's past not only dominates the story, but also slows its pacing. Argh! Sorry.

I may change this eventually, but not any time soon, as there isn't any easy fix.

* * *

EPOV

"She's coming! She's coming!" Alice was eagerly bouncing up and down. The whole house was anticipating Heather's arrival.

Esme was "tidying up" the kitchen, having finished the living room, bathroom and bedrooms, making them _more_ spotless than when

she had started. Emmett had practiced his arm wrestling with Jasper while Alice and Rosalie gathered up some of their old clothes

for Heather, which they would probably force her to wear, and Carlisle was still working on a sermon for her for why she _was _saved.

Even the tulips which Esme and Alice had planted a few days ago seemed to stand taller, awaiting Heather's appearance.

Heather walked briskly past the neighboring houses and came up to our doorstep a few hours before dawn, casually humming the

hymn "This is My Father's World."

She was about to knock when Alice wrenched the door open.

* * *

HPOV 

As I started to knock, the door was opened by someone.

"Hi, Heather!" exclaimed a short, slender female.

"Um... hello." I was a bit taken aback by her informality. Not for the first time, I wondered about how customs must have changed in

my centuries of solitude. Was this type of greeting now normal?

Edward smiled to welcome me. I nodded. It was good to see him, too.

The rest of his family appeared in the room almost instantly, and Edward began the introductions.

"Heather, this is Alice," Edward said, introducing me to the small, almost pixie-like girl who had opened the door. She grinned

mischievously in response, and Edward narrowed his eyes at her. I stared, confused.

"It's a bit complicated," he stated, by way of explanation. Edward moved on to the other family members.

"This is Rosalie." The blond female nodded and then smirked at Alice, whose grin was now almost alarming.

Then he introduced me to Esme; a thin brunette, Emmett; a big muscular fellow, and Carlisle and Jasper, who were nearly as tall as

Emmett.

We all sat down in their living room on various sofas and they told me their family history and Alice and Jasper's powers,

and then Carlisle said gently, "Edward hasn't said much about you, would you like to share your story?"


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Edward's divine, I wish he was mine! (Swoons, _again_)

This chapter is dedicated to dumb-ely-dort, because so far she's the _only_ one who's reviewed. (Isn't that _sad_?)

If _you _would like to have a chapter dedicated to _you_... just press the magic button and add some words!

* * *

We walked into their living room and all sat down on two of their leather sofas, facing each other, 

with Edward, me, Alice and Rosalie on one couch and Carlisle, Esme, Jasper and Emmett on the other,

only separated by a slim, mahogany coffee table.

They told me about their family's history and Alice and Jasper's powers,

and then Carlisle said gently, "Edward hasn't said much about you, would you like to share your story?"

* * *

"Well..." _not really_. I began anyway. "I was born the 1620s, I think. My father was a farmer, so he named me Catherine _Heather_

Morgan, since he loved plants so much. I had six siblings; Bruce was the oldest, then me, next David, Evan, Jessica, Rebecca and

Anna.

Father had planned on naming us all in alphabetical order, 'to better keep track of you rascals,'" I quoted, grinning; "but Mother had

some trouble with the last pregnancy, and when Anna was born, she insisted that the baby's name _had_ to be Anna, since she had

been given to us by God's grace, and said that _any_ name that meant something other than 'grace' would be a lie.

Father was rather annoyed with Mother for this, but after a few days he admitted that Mother was right; since Anna _was_ the most

beautiful, charming little baby we'd ever seen, and she was christened Anna April Morgan."

As years passed, Bruce married Sarah, then David married Ruth—and I finally became engaged to someone; Kendrick Kelly.

Mother had been very worried about me, since I was almost twenty five, and my prospects were dwindling. I didn't care for

romance,and I occasionally felt like someone was watching when men wooed me, but I had never been the superstitious type,

and I knew that I had to get married in order to secure a financial future for myself and keep the town's gossip away from my family.

And I could tell that Kendrick, in addition to being a kind, prosperous and respected gentleman, also loved me deeply; so it would

have been a happy marriage.

_Everyone_ in the county came to celebrate our wedding; the pews were bursting with people and excitement; and Anna was the

flower girl, trailing dutifully behind me.

But as we stood to receive our vows, the church doors opened and there was a dark blur down the center aisle, and large battle axe

lodged itself in my heart. I fell back—not dead—but screaming; 'the fire! the fire!' over and over..."

* * *

I'm going to add physical descriptions of Heather's family, but it's not on top on my list of priorities at the moment. 


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Edward's _divine_, I wish he was _mine_!

(I just split chapter five, so if you're confused, that's why.)

* * *

But as we stood to receive our vows, the church doors opened and there was a dark blur down the center aisle, and large battle axe 

lodged itself in my heart. I fell back—not dead—but screaming; 'the fire! the fire!' over and over..."

* * *

There was instant chaos—most people quickly filed out, and the minister blessed me to keep the evil spirits away. 

Then Kendrick and David gently, carefully carried me to a horse, as the rest of my immediate family followed. Kendrick's house

was seven miles away, and Father's was four; so we all went to Bruce's house, because it was the closest, at only two miles away.

When we got to the house, Kendrick carried me through the doorway and set me down in the spare bedroom.

Mother and Kendrick stayed by my side...

"When I had..._miraculously recovered_," my voice cracked—and I was suddenly calm.

"No, Jasper, I _want_ to feel it," I muttered to the floor. _I want to feel__** something **__again._

The pain came rushing back, but this time I was better prepared for it.

"When I had recovered in the night," I began again, "Mother ran and brought the rest of the family back into the room... and..."

I paused for a moment, continuing in a stony, lifeless voice, "there was so much blood pulsing that I couldn't think; I killed them all;

Mother, Father, David, Becka, Bruce, Sarah, Evan, Jessica, Kendrick..." I swallowed. "even little Anna. I killed them so quickly that

they didn't even have time to scream...Then I fled..." _from the monster I had become _"...a few dozen counties north, and stayed in

a forest for a few weeks... the vampire who had changed me met me there a day or two after that.

He...he apologized for what he did, but said it was '_necessary'_—because he wanted me to_ join him_, and become his mate—and

said he could tell from watching me that..." my voice caught again, "that I wouldn't leave my family 'without some persuasion.' then he

told me that he had burned down the house to keep the vampires' secrecy, 'you should have thought of that yourself, but I suppose

you don't know the rules... or rule; there's only really one; you must never tell humans of our existence, or we'll have to kill them,

since we can't let just anyone know about us—after all, they might start a war against us—and that would be very annoying.'"

"When I rejected his offer and _demanded_ that he change me back, he stroked my arms and said, 'I can tell you are upset. But think

about it; you aredestined for so much _more_ than _humanity; _and I am a member of the Volturian guard, which is almost vampire

royalty. With those humans, you could have been a common _farmer's wife,_ but with me you shall become a _queen!'" _

I looked up from the floor to see every face frozen in disbelief.

_"_I couldn't hold back my fury after he said that; I attacked him," I said, my voice hard, "I struck him—again and again—until he

could barely stand, before running north as fast as I could through Scotland. Then I swam to Iceland on my way to Greenland, so I

could escape the blood. I had planned on killing myself there, but found that impossible."

Jasper gave me a questioning, concerned look, but I shook my head—I wasn't going to dull what little remained of my faded human

memories."Eventually my thirst became too much again, and I killed a passing fox... I was _so_ relieved that I wouldn't have to hunt

humans, that I threw myself into hunting and learning how to control my thirst. I hoped that, one day, I might be able to control myself

enough to live near humans again." I swallowed again.

"A decade or so later that day came, and I swam to the Northwest Territories, stopping on various islands along the way. After a few

years I decided to live not just _near_ humans but _with_ them—as 'an avid gardener who loved to go hiking'—and I heard about a new

nation called "the United States of America" so I left and went down to Vermont(1) to see it for myself._"_ _It was there that I met _

_John and Amber_. "And I've been traveling around ever since." Both Jasper and Edward could tell I was leaving something out,

but—thankfully—they didn't press the matter.

* * *

(1) This is currently subject to change; it might instead be Massachusetts, New York, North Carolina, Rhode Island... etc. 

I really haven't decided which yet.

* * *

On looking back at this, I think I that the male vampire who changed Heather sounds a lot like Marcus (from New Moon,) 

so I _might _have him be Marcus, otherwise I'll probably call him Tyrell. Does anyone have a preference?

...I'm very sad that I had to kill Kendrick just 'cause that's _such_ an awesome name... (sighs) ah well...


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Edward's _divine,_ I _wish_ he was mine!

(I just split chapter five in two, so if you're confused as to why this is chapter seven, that's why.)

* * *

HPOV 

_Well, maybe I should just go on and tell the rest of it, too… get it over with…_

I looked over at Edward. He nodded encouragingly, but I was still tense. _Erm, I won't be able to do this without Jasper. _

For some reason I couldn't voice my need for help. But Edward understood and gave another, smaller nod. Then he caught Jasper's

eye and inclined his head towards me. Jasper gave one nod and I started.

If I could have, I would have told this without his help, but I knew that would be impossible, because even _thinking _about what had

happened often felt as though I was impaled upon a thousand spikes while someone carved out my heart using a blunt knife,

so actually _talking_ about it would mean that his assistance was a necessity.

I sighed; I was already feeling tremendously guilty for what I had out him through _so far_, this would only be worse.

"One day when I was living in Minnesota(1), selling my flowers on the streets, a young, slightly scruffy looking man and a little girl

with wavy brown hair and innocent chocolate eyes walked by, holding hands. As they were about to pass my booth she _stopped_,

wide-eyed, pointing with a tiny finger in my direction and said '_**LOOK!**__'_ He glanced up at me giving me an embarrassed smile

and said to the girl, 'Yes, they are nice flowers, aren't they?' He then tried to tug her away, but she had _firmly_ rooted herself to the

spot, reaching out at them with her other hand," I smiled mischievously—_she had been SO adorable..._ "So he was about to pick her

up and carry her, but she was just so cute that I couldn't resist giving her some of my flowers. I gently grabbed his arm,

'You forgot something,' I said, giving him five daisies, and one each of the tulips, sunflowers, lilac, foxglove and hydrangea.

He of course blushed profusely, since he was unable to buy them and didn't want charity, but he seemed to be having trouble finding

a polite way to refuse. I looked him in the eye and pleaded quietly, desperately, 'Please?' and the girl looked up at him wistfully

with puppy dog eyes. He sighed. 'Oh... _alright_,' he said taking them. 'Thank you so much ma'am-' I cut him off. I shook my head

and cut him off. 'It's my pleasure, sir—she reminds me of an old friend."

* * *

A month or so later as I was setting up my stall I heard the paperboy shout out the day's headline: 'Huge fire ravages the Fairfield 

Apartments!' (1) I glanced his way—and saw _her_ sketched on the front page. I rushed over to him. 'Where is she now?' I asked,

pointing to the picture. He shrugged. '_I_ dunno—_read it._" I rolled my eyes and paid for a copy of the Louisville Star, (1) searching

for her location. It wasn't easy since I've never fully learned to read, but I made do. She was at an orphanage on 42nd Street and

Benson. I waited almost eight weeks for someone to find her or adopt her, walking by every few days to see if she was still there.

Sure enough, she was. Finally I decided to take her in.

I called her Amber, because she'd risen from the ashes like an ember, but with an A, so she could be named after Anna.

I was terrified of the responsibility of looking after her," _she was_ _such a fragile, precious little creature _"but she didn't have anyone

else."

* * *

(1) I also have NO idea what city or state this will be. It might be Louisville, Kentucky, but it could also be somewhere in New York, North Carolina, Ohio or Pennsylvania. 

It will probably be a really rainy, eastern state. But I'll have to do some more research before I decide.


	8. Author's Note

I won't be able to update as much since school's started, but I'll try to have the next chapter up by February.

This next bit is_ killing_ me (figuratively, at least) ... I know what I want to write for the next

few chapters now, but I haven't worked out some of the details to the overall plot yet, which I need to do before I continue,

so that I know what to build up to... argh!

Merveilleux24


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